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Hey Wiley-
Why is it that people walk around like they have something up their butts in Los Angeles town?
Dear StULA-
I have a dear friend, Bat Dog, who I went to for advice on this question of yours. Bat Dog is the defender of the citizen’s right to produce Guarana (droppings), fighting government oppression and criminal behavior, just like Bat Man, Bat Girl and even little Robin.
Bat Dog has informed me that the LA City government has a massive conspiracy to keep poop up in its citizens’ bums. Why?
Those originally targeted by the LA City government as the test subjects for the conspiracy……da da da dun, no dump.
Because that is more cost effective than up-dating their sewer system. They must keep 25% of the population constipated, or else the sewers explode and more guarana seeps out into the atmosphere that already floats around in LA.
It’s the great constipation conspiracy, according to my source, Bat Dog. California and Los Angeles pretend to be giving assistance, but they are really just stuffing people with bread and cheese, to prevent other substances from escaping, thus preserving the fragile sewer pipes and system that is rotting and rusting away.
Because a large population loves to gorge on delicious Mexican food in the state and especially in the Southern region, referred to as The Southland, the government must counter the sliding with blocked movement.
Does that answer your question?
Wiley
P.S. Bat Dog has some social unrest shirts he wants me to advertise here. They are white and have brown letters saying, “Got Guarana?”
anyone who wants one can email me here.
Hey Wiley-
What is the deal with music festivals like Glastonbury and Coachella, etc.?
Dear MF-
It’s really something to do, somewhere to show case your fashion sense between February and October fashion shows, kinda like the Bedford platform of the L-train. These festivals are usually late Spring, summer…
It’s really a huge contest to see how many bracelets you can get on your hand: backstage, vip, invite only parties. It’s a whole lotta plastic going on.
Festival goers, remember to cut your special bracelets in half so poor little birdies won’t get their feet caught in them and die.
Glastonbury is an excuse to wear high boots when it’s not super cold. I guess people in LA don’t even need a festival to do that- they wear fur lined Uggs when it’s 105 degrees F out- you know who you are. Fashion vs. Temperature. Fashion always slugs out the competition somehow.
Bands? oh yeah- no one pays attention to them. We’re too busy getting goodies in the VIP beer garden.
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